my mind is

my mind is
e.e. cummings

my mind is
a big hunk of irrevocable nothing which touch and
taste and smell and hearing and sight keep hitting and
chipping with sharp fatal tools
in an agony of sensual chisels i perform squirms of
chrome and execute strides of cobalt
nevertheless i
feel that i cleverly am being altered that i slightly am
becoming something a little different, in fact
myself
Hereupon helpless i utter lilac shrieks and scarlet
bellowings.

Between innocence and experience, which is better to have? e.e. cummings presents this argument in his poem "my mind is," in which he discusses the human mind prior to experiences and its state after being chiseled by life.

While the mind is "nothing," it has been unexposed to real experience. It's a clean slate waiting to be molded by the senses. However, when the narrator mentions that the senses are "chipping with sharp fatal tools" his mind, it's implied that the changes are permanent. Because these tools are "fatal," perhaps the changes are viewed as deadly and irreversible. Experience, therefore, is negatively received, while the innocence before is worthless. 

When compared to Plato's Allegory of the Cave, this structuring of the mind can be seen as enlightenment. As people are given knowledge, their minds are shaped around this new information, and it's nearly impossible for them to regress back to a point when the knowledge was unknown to them. The freed prisoner in Plato's allegory attempts to become familiar with his fellow prisoners in the cave, telling them of all the knowledge he's been given from his experience above ground. However, they ridicule him and he's excluded from their activities, no longer having the same mindset as they do.

The narrator's "squirms of chrome" and "strides of cobalt" makes the narrator appear to be machine-like. The descriptions provide a rather mechanical representation of the movements, as if every human is built to act this way. By being exposed to new experiences, the narrator is being exposed to the repetition of society in which a structure is strictly imposed upon its citizens. The "agony" over performing such actions could be the narrator's hatred of conformity, which may also be appealing as the chisels are described as "sensual."

However, the "altering" experienced makes the narrator feel different, becoming "himself" amid a community of mechanical citizens. The narrator's mind is able to interpret experiences in a different way than others, so despite the outside behaviors resembling everyone else's, the narrator's inner thoughts are his own and individual in their meanings. As a result, the narrator is able to distinguish himself from his peers, becoming "himself" when others can only be "themselves." 

With the brain being exposed to all the different stimuli and experiences, the narrator begins to have violent threats of "shrieks" and "bellowings." These vocalized actions seem to be of turmoil and anger, as if the mind is threatening to split. He accepts the writhing under scattered thoughts and cluttered ideas as he's mentioned to be "helpless" upon all the experiences. This shows that the loss of innocence is inevitable, that the mind must face reality sooner or later. As the narrator mind was once a big hunk of "nothing," it is easily manipulated by the senses.

It's hard to determine whether cummings prefers innocence or experience in this piece. It seems as though each of the two are negative in their own ways, in which with innocence, the mind is nothing, while with experience, the mind is rendered "helpless."